It is an all too common occurrence in the world today that we as a society tend to identify people by their behaviours and by what they do, and in that we lose sight of the awesome amazing lovable being at the core of every person  People can tend to become identified (or identify others) with the ‘good’ roles and behaviour patterns, such as being a good mum, a good friend, a good student, a good son, daughter, sibling, a good employee, a good X, Y & Z  But how does that person feel when their ‘good’ role is challenged … the good mother is challenged by her child melting down in public or by a comment or feedback which is perceived as an attack  The simple fact is that anxiety levels rise and thus deterioration of behaviour and mental wellness is inevitable  People can also tend to be identified (or identify others) by the perceived ‘bad’ of their choices … that badly behaved person, bad parenting, the bad student or words and labels to that effect  Note: Neither ‘good’ or ‘bad’ are part of the language endorsed at FABIC where people are never identified by their behaviours and/or labels   Too often people get judged by the behaviours they do or don’t use – an approach that hinders behaviour change as people don’t feel understood or safe when their behaviour is judged. This presentation covers the essential foundations and language to use when supporting any person with lasting behaviour change. We will discuss the importance of  knowing people by the awesome, amazing lovable being they innately are, while bringing understanding to the message that: Sometimes what people do is thumbs up, and sometimes what people do is thumbs down, but at the core of every single person is ALWAYS an awesome amazing lovable being.