Description:
OPD Points: 10
Key Learning Objectives / Outcomes:
- The surprising truth about the prevalence of affairs and relationship betrayal
- Common myths about betrayal – and what most clinicians don’t know
- How to work with the subtle – and important – ways culture and gender shape your clients’ experiences
- The problem with implicit fidelity agreements
- What you need to know about comorbid factors: addiction, safety, and mental health crises after betrayal
- How the brain responds to betrayal
- A practical approach to organise your treatment plan for an affair
- The most essential tool to regulate the emotions of overwhelmed couples
- Key interventions to stop the ‘Betrayal Spiral’
- How to understand safety in the context of betrayal
- What you need to know BEFORE you create a Safety Plan
- How to facilitate safer check ins
- Recognize and respond to suicidal ideation after betrayal
- The clinician’s role in managing secrets
- Engaging the Betrayer
- Engaging the Betrayed
- Managing Dual Alliance: when your client is the relationship
- Dealing with Ambivalence
- The essential role of co-regulation for couples
- Orientation
- Attunement
- How to repair the sexual relationship after an affair
- Total apology and amends dialogue
- Repairs, declarations, goals and promises
- How to work with therapeutic separations
- Your role as therapist in challenging gaslighting
- Key steps to manage shame
- How to resolve ambivalence
- When and why to give homework
- Training in co- and self-regulation
- Identifying environmental support and stressors
- How ‘why questions’ and interrogation by the betrayed perpetuate betrayal problems
- Prepping for disclosures
- Developmental and sexual blueprints
- Staggered disclosures
- Disclosure models
- Prepping for fuller disclosures
- Using the 5 stage therapy progress model
- Building an alliance
- Scaffolding communication
- Titrating treatment – intensives, individual and extended sessions
- Invitations to responsibility
- Nurturing the new relationship
Presenter / Provider:
Presenter Qualifications:
Steven Dromgool MCouns, MNZAC, is the founder and Clinical Director of Relate, New Zealand’s largest specialist relationship counselling and therapy service. He has worked with couples for over 2 decades specialising in working with couples, individuals and families struggling with issues ranging from sexual abuse and offending, affairs and betrayal, communication, new relationship preparation, navigating relationships with Autism Spectrum Disorder, anxiety and depression.
Steven is committed to ongoing professional development and training over the past decades has trained to advanced levels in over 5 of the top approaches to couples therapy, contributed to the development of another approach and led the Relate team in the development of Presence Oriented Relationship Therapy which has been taught around New Zealand and internationally in locations as diverse as Alaska, Qatar, Hungary and Greece.
